Confidence is a highly valued trait in everyone and women love a man who’s self-assured. This one skill can help you become successful in any endeavor because it brings people to you. Even if you don’t know something, when you come to someone with enough confidence, more often than not, you can get them to help you. Whether you are approaching your love interest, presenting your next big idea, or starting a business, confidence is your pal. Why? Women like men who know themselves, people like presenters who speak as if they know their topic, and investors want to be assured you are a competent leader.
If you are lacking in confidence, don’t worry. Confidence is not an inborn trait, it is a skill, and with time you can improve your confidence. As you work on this skill, you can pretend you have more confidence than you do. No one knows how you feel on the inside unless you show them. Here are some ways to convince others you are the most confident guy in the room.
#1 Dress Well
Men who have low confidence are often concerned with “over-dressing”, while confident men don’t have this fear. They strive to be the best-dressed man in the room. When you dress well, you project power, tell everyone you care about yourself, and that you are to be treated with respect. When you are more assured of yourself you don’t worry if others think you are trying too hard, you wear fitted clothes that project maturity and style. Before buying a new wardrobe, know the difference between well-dressed and flashy. Flashy screams, “I need attention.”, which will negate your efforts to look confident.
#2 Speak Clearly
Speaking concisely, clearly, and assertively is an excellent way to seem confident if you don’t feel this way. Project your voice so you don’t have to repeat yourself, but don’t speak too loudly. Keep communication succinct. Rambling makes you look like you don’t know what you’re talking about. Select your words carefully, but don’t use large words just to sound smarter. This makes you look like you are insecure. Read more and you will come across words you don’t know. As you learn the meanings of these words they will be integrated into your vocabulary. Rather than seeming as if you tacked large words on for effect, they will come unprovoked from your mouth because they will be the only word that pops into your head. These words will become the perfect words and no other words will do.
#3 Stand Upright
Avoid slouching, lack of eye contact, and limp handshakes. All of these behaviors make your body language look apologetic. You believe in yourself, so take up space. Often your body language says much more about your confidence that your words every can. Walk confidently. Keep your posture upright, shoulders back, and your head up. Maintain eye contact, but don’t stare. That can be either creepy or intimidating. Give strong handshakes and smile, often. There, truly, aren’t many ways to project confidence that are better than a smile. It invites people in and helps you learn more information from them.
#4 Forget You Are Inexperienced
If you don’t have the experience, tell no one. Pretend as if you have done everything before. When you are given a work-related task and have no idea how to do it, accept it with confidence and figure out how to do it. After it is completed, learn the skills, so the next time you actually will know how to do it. If your love interest seems much cooler than you, pretend you have dated a person like this before. Remember, because you are amazing, this person isn’t out of your league. The goal is to push yourself out of your comfort zone and practice your confidence in different contexts.
#5 Don’t Brag Excessively
Arrogant, i.e. insecure, guys brag all of the time. They think it makes them look confident, but it actually comes across as needy. Confident people may brag a little, too, but it is subtle. This is because they have little need for praise and they are humble. While they may want a little ego stroke once in awhile, they believe in their abilities and accomplishments without external validation, for the most part. If you do want to brag a little, ask a leading question. Let’s say, you just got a new car, and are excited about it. Ask about someone else’s car then bring up your new car. Don’t talk about how much it cost too much, though, this shades into arrogance. If it is a known expensive car you don’t have to mention price at all.
#6 Close Your Mouth, Open Your Ears
Talking the right amount projects confidence because you show your thoughts are important and should be regarded as such and you don’t have to jump into a conversation. Together, with active listening, you reduce the chance you are seen as arrogant or insecure. A man who must talk a lot comes off as a person who needs the spotlight or doesn’t value his contributions. On the other hand, don’t be too quiet, either. This may make you look scared or hesitant. Share your point and no more.
#7 Don’t Consider Failure
Approach all activities as if you have no chance of falling. If you ask a woman to dance, assume she has no choice but to say yes. In interviews, assume you are the best candidate possible. This will help you project the confidence that could get you that dance or job. Failure looks for cracks in your confidence so it can insert doubt. While failure is always a possibility, assume it doesn’t exist.